I had visions of being wise.
I had thought that with the passage of time and after the fulfillment of many life experiences, that I would be wise.
I thought that life would be simpler, not more complicated, and that the answers would come more easily to me.
That is not the case.
I look around myself and I realize that it is foolish to think that one can live a life and have it somewhat figured out. That is not possible. The equation of people in the mix means that there is never going to be an answer and that each time you attempt to solve an issue, that it is truly like walking a tightrope, like a crapshoot, where there is a fifty-fifty chance of it going either way. Our choice of solution may or may not work like a charm.
I realize that my education is, perhaps, the best thing ever that happened to me. I realize that my choosing French was providential. I have found that my study of French literature and delving into the world of absurd theatre and existentialism, and finding meaning within the chaos of events, was more helpful than anything else in my life experiences.
I went through life for so many years enjoying my experiences and although not as rich as I might have liked to be, I am wealthy in family and experiences and wondering when the shoe was going to drop.
Life is not easy and there is no way to know, in advance, as to where the path is going to lead. There is no way to know anything about it. There is no way to know what is coming internationally, nationally, regionally, or personally. Things will come across the path that will perhaps be absolutely nothing but routine, things might come across the path that will defy common knowledge, common sense, and even logic.
There is no way to know what is coming and there is no manual provided to deal with the insanity that life is capable of dealing. Who would have ever imagined a virus (well, a few authors did) that would decimate our population and that of the world, and that when a vaccine was available that people would refuse to take it?
I am gobsmacked. I am sad that I am not wise. I am sad that people behave the way they do. I am sad about the legacy that my generation is leaving.